The Transpersonal Psychologist

Parents Can Help Prevent Suicide in GLBTQ Adolescents

2010-08-17T14:46:00.006-04:00

Disclaimer: If you have come to my blog looking for help because you are in crisis or are contemplating suicide or need to call for someone in crisis, PLEASE seek help immediately. Call 911, or call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).

Suicide.

A permanent solution to an often temporary problem.

Among Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgendered, and Queer/Questioning youth, the number of completed suicides are twice as high among adolescents as their heterosexual peers. When looking at the factors that contribute to suicide and completed suicides, we have learned that support is vital to prevention. Prevention is key when it comes to this issue.

How can parents help?
Listen to your child. Don't make assumptions or judgments. Ask questions that are supportive.

How do I know this?
I've been through it. I'd like to share my personal journey with my parents, being gay, and learning to cope with a society that can't seem to accept the fact that I'm wired to love a fellow female.

When I was 15 years old, my partner and I decided to commit our lives to each other and "go steady." We were not out of the closet, per se, but we were outed by some of our peers. Not in a kind nor accepting way, either. The word "Dyke" was a common epithet thrown at us, and, on more than one occasion, boys reacted violently toward me. The peer abuse was pretty bad. We were rather isolated for the most part, being the only outed gay girls in our school.

While I wasn't actively suicidal, I was passively suicidal - in other words, I wouldn't seek a way to kill myself, but I would wish for death to release the pain I was in...pain from the lack of support and understanding - not from being gay. (So many people misunderstand that the GLBTQ community is quite happy once they have support and acceptance. Being this way is not a mental illness.)

My partner came out to her parents. Her parents called my mother. I will never forget that day, and, with her permission, I am going to share what happened.

We were in the car on the way home when my mother told me about the call. When I said that it was true, that I thought I was gay, she reeled. She told me that I must be "trying to be a martyr" for a cause of the underdog. After all, she had gay and lesbian friends, but certainly her daughter couldn't fit this bill. She fretted and panicked over the treatment I would receive. I told her it was too late, that I was like this in spite of her and my peers at school.

She responded by slapping me across the face for backtalk.

That's when I lost it. Crying and yelling, I told her if she ever hit me again I would kill her. I was sick of no one being on my side, and that I'd kill us both by running the car off the road. I remember yelling, "THAT WOULD SOLVE IT, WOULDN'T IT? KILL THE DYKE AND HER ASHAMED MOTHER!"

My mom is really good at being calm when someone else is freaking out, though, so this managed to make her more steady. She told me she still loved me and though she didn't understand, I would have to tell my father, and that he would likely have a heart attack when he heard.

This got a reaction out of me...I didn't want to be the one to kill my dad.

When we got home, my father had made dinner and was sitting at the head of the kitchen table, reading a local newspaper. Mom introduced the news: "Your daughter has something to tell you."

"Nope," was my reply. I was terrified. I made myself busy by getting a drink from the refrigerator. So, Mom told him, "Anne and Heather are a couple now."

My father just looked from me to my mother. I froze, waiting for the nitroglycerin tablets, the CPR, and the ambulance.

"So?" Dad asked, "is she pregnant? Dying? Has VD?"

My mother started, "John, this is terrible! She's going to lead a terrible life of prejudice!"

Dad took her hand. "Helene, she already does. Maybe this is just a phase. If it is, great, and if not, that's okay, too." He had me sit down at the table, next to him.

"I'd like for the both of you to get some therapy for this."

We took his advice. His calm, steady support in the face of this storm helped us bear some of the hardest years ahead. Mom quickly became my #1 fan and cheerleader. I started coming out to more people, knowing that when it got rough, I could go to my parents and they would love me and my partner unconditionally.

They taught me what fidelity meant, and I am pleased to say my partner and I have been together for 20 years, and in a Civil Union for 10 of those years.

Once I got into therapy with a Licensed Mental Health Counselor who was trained in GLBTQ issues, I began to grow. The suicidal ideation went away. I had support. I had people I could talk to when my relationship was rocky.

Think about this: Most GLBTQ teens have no one to talk to save their partner at the time. That partner is also facing pressure from a heterosexist society. So, when their relationship hits the hard times, as all relationships do, they wind up with no one to talk to about it. I was fortunate to have a couple of caring parents, neighbors, and a counselor! Most kids will not have those resources.

So what can you do?
If you are a parent and your child has just come out to you, BE SUPPORTIVE. Go to PFLAG.org for support, help, and answers. PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) has a ton of resources that can help you and your child.

Your natural instinct is to protect your children from pain, suffering, and prejudice, so be the one person who doesn't inflict it on them by making snap judgments.

If you know a teen who is going through this process, help them speak to their parents. Help them get involved in support groups. Give them a safety net in case they are thrown out by their parents (it still happens, yes). Be willing to refer them to appropriate support groups. Listen to their parents' concerns, and, armed with appropriate information, help them understand.

You have the power to help prevent suicide.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Chiropractic and Reiki - A Love Story

2010-05-18T10:20:00.003-04:00

Chiropractic and Reiki – A Love Story

As a Reiki Practitioner, I see clients who are often working their way towards wellness, but are still out of balance. Daily stress, good and bad, puts pressure on the physical body as well as the psychological being. Furthermore, the spiritual body (for lack of a better term) doesn't always get the fuel it needs. Clients come in simultaneously keyed up from stress and exhausted all at the same time. It's not fun for them, at all.

Reiki is great at restoring energy balance throughout the body. It helps the physical body to relax in such a way that the mind-body's “healing response” can begin to work.

Sometimes, though, I will be working with a client who has some seriously “stuck” energy, for whatever reason – physical, mental, or spiritual causes – it just sits there, causing all kinds of trouble.

It's for this reason I'm glad to be doing my practice out of Eaton Chiropractic in Kennesaw, Georgia. Why? Glad you asked!

Chiropractic, when performed from a wellness model of health, restores the body's natural ability to heal itself. When our spinal bones are not where they should be, our Central Nervous System (CNS) can send all sorts of signals to the muscles, but the message gets misinterpreted. Think of it like a bad phone connection. The CNS is yelling, “CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?” and the muscles are hearing, “CA...U...EAR...OW?” Yet, rather than the muscles saying, “what? Could you repeat that?” They say, “Oh, I have an ear canal, yes! We'll let that infection right on in, then!” It's not that our muscles aren't intelligent, they just don't question the messages sent by Central because the bones are running interference on them. So, they plod along doing the best they can with the information they have. The nerves get irritated, and send pain signals. Then you, the innocent being, are in excruciating pain! ;)

Then chiropractic steps in and pushes the bones back into place. Suddenly, the signal is loud and clear from Central. Muscles are operating at maximum efficiency, and the nerves, poor irritated nerves, are suddenly heard, and they are relieved. After several treatments, the body adjusts to it's proper alignment. They all stop annoying you, the poor innocent being, and you can operate as one again.

But if you stop treatments just because you feel good, this can cause problems. It would be like never getting a tune-up for your car and then wondering why the engine is smoking and making grinding and wheezing noises. Like that car, you need to be tuned-up on a regular basis to make sure all your parts are in place to keep you at optimal operation.

Reiki is the energy “mirror” of chiropractic care. The first session feels nice, relaxing, and for the first time in a long time, your body is soaking up renewed energy. Sometimes that will leave you feeling a bit grumpy a few days later, because you're not used to feeling that good anymore! So coming in for multiple treatments helps get over that “healing response” as we like to call it. Once your body is recharged with Reiki energy, it's important to come back for regular visits in order to have long battery life. ;) I usually recommend six sessions in two weeks, then two sessions per week for three weeks, and then once a week for four weeks. After that, once a month will do well until something else arises (stressful situations in particular), and you need booster sessions.

Chiropractic works so well with Reiki because not only do they follow similar patterns, but because chiropractic care releases the physical body's energy blocks, it allows the Reiki recipient to get a wonderful Reiki session. When I have worked on a client who has just been adjusted by the chiropractors at Eaton Chiropractic, the Reiki just flows in abundance. Uninhibited by physical blocks due to the adjustment, the treatments move throughout the body much faster and give the muscles deep relaxation. It's a great love story of body, mind, and spirit.

Enjoy!

Namasté,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

Reiki Client Intake Forms

2010-05-12T18:38:00.002-04:00

The last post I put up was for my part-time Reiki business. I thought it would be nice to share with my blog family to show all of you what kind of questions you may encounter during your first Reiki session.

Please feel free to comment with questions. I will answer them to the best of my abilities.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

DIVINE REIKI SERVICES - CLIENT INTAKE...

2010-05-12T18:37:00.001-04:00

DIVINE REIKI SERVICES - CLIENT INTAKE FORM

TODAY'S DATE________________________________________

YOUR NAME___________________________________________

ADDRESS__________________________________________________________________________________________________

PHONE_______________________________________________ EMAIL______________________________________________

DATE OF BIRTH______________________________ OCCUPATION_______________________________________________

EMERGENCY CONTACT NAME & NUMBER_________________________________________________________________________

PLEASE FILL OUT THE FOLLOWING TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITY:

1. Have you had a Reiki treatment before? Yes / No If yes, date of last session? _________________

2. What were you being seen for? ______________________________________________________________

3. What was your experience like? _____________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

4. Do you have any difficulty lying on your back/front for the session? _____________________________________

If yes, please explain _________________________________________________________________________

5. Would you prefer a chair that keeps your body upright? Yes / No

6. Are you currently under medical supervision? Yes / No

7. Condition(s) being treated for _______________________________________________________________

8. Medicines presently taking & for what condition _________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

9. What are your goals for today’s session? ______________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

10. Do you have any additional comments or questions before your Reiki session? ______________________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Explanation of Reiki and Consent Form

What is Reiki?

Reiki is the pure form of healing energy. A treatment feels like a wonderful glowing radiance that flows through you and surrounds you. Reiki treats the whole person including body, emotions, mind, and spirit and creates many beneficial effects including relaxation and feelings of peace, security, and well-being. Reiki is a simple, natural, and safe method of spiritual healing and self-improvement that everyone can use.

Reiki is NOT a replacement for medical treatment!

Please read and agree to the following before submitting your request:

Reiki Consent:

Our services neither diagnose nor prescribe for disease conditions. All clients are encouraged to seek competent medical help when those services are deemed necessary. The client accepts total responsibility for his/her own health care and maintenance. Nothing said, typed, printed, or produced by us is intended or meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat a disease, or take the place of a licensed physician. This work is not medical treatment, and we do not prescribe medications and/or substances. I understand that the Reiki session given involves a natural method of energy balancing for the purpose of stress reduction, relaxation, and healing. A Reiki professional will not interfere with the treatment of a licensed medical professional. I also understand that it is not massage therapy. It is recommended that I see a licensed physician or licensed health care professional for any physical or psychological ailment I have. By signing below, I acknowledge and fully agree with the above information.

__________________________________________ _____________________________________________

YOUR SIGNATURE REIKI PRACTITIONER'S SIGNATURE

__________________________________________ _____________________________________________

DATE YOU SIGNED THIS FORM DATE REIKI PRACTITIONER SIGNED

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions: 7 of 7

2010-03-03T10:24:00.000-05:00

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions: 7 of 7

7. Where do I find the rest of the answers?

This final installation of this series explores the above question from an ecumenical and existential standpoint. Rather than delve into any particular dogma or religious view, the question is left open to the many interpretations available in our Universe.

Everyone is on some sort of journey in life. This journey can be spiritual, secular, sacred, and profane. We often look to outward sources for our answers. We read sacred and inspired texts, such as the Qur'an, the Talmud, the Torah, the Old and New Testaments of the Bible, the Book of Mormon, Black Elk's “The Sacred Pipe,” Self-Help books, Wiccan and New Age books, Viktor Frankl, Irvin Yalom, and other Existentialist works...and all of these things help us put our beliefs in order. They give us guidelines to help us make sense of the enormity of the universe. All of these things have a place in our lives and help us penetrate the darkness.

There comes a time in our spiritual development where we either embrace or reject the beliefs of our ancestors – or we allow them to evolve over time. If we are to grow in our development, we need to move in a direction that benefits us in body, mind, and spirit. As we grow from children to adults, so must our beliefs, or else we risk creating an all-too-fragile fantasy for ourselves that can fall like a house of cards when given the slightest amount of questioning. We become defensive of our beliefs, which leads to misunderstandings among friends, making enemies, and general chaos which can be self-destructive or violate others' rights to believe as they choose. We can move fluidly from acceptance, to tolerance, to intolerance, to fear and hatred if we are not careful. This is a dangerous direction, indeed!

When we search outward, there is a moment when we must pause to take things inward...digest them, process them, and either reject them or incorporate them into our being, our identities. When it comes to this junction, I have a piece of advice that was given to my by a very wise professor of mine: never outright reject something you don't fully understand. In other words, take time to fully comprehend what is being offered. Sit with it for some time. Meditate on it. Pray on it. If it still doesn't fit with you, throw it away then. Knee-jerk reactions are human nature...but they can limit our possibilities.

Sometimes there are no answers...we just live in a big unknown – with all the knowledge we have, we may feel it is woefully inadequate to answer all our questions; there seem to be no satisfactory answers.
This is part of the Great Mystery; we need to learn to live in it, questions and all. Find comfort in the fact that no one has all the answers! Seek the mystery, and it will come to you. Someday, the answers will all be clear...and if they're not? Well, that's okay, too, isn't it?

So laugh, love, enjoy, eat cookies. Our incarnation, our time here, in this form, doesn't last long!

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

The Kundalini Reiki Experience

2010-02-19T18:49:00.002-05:00

This is another break from my Seven Spiritual Questions. I will be getting to that last question soon, I promise!

Sometimes it seems impossible to find a good Reiki Master in your area. Also, as most of you already know, I am not a fan of Chikara Reiki Do (even though even it has some merits, being part of Reiki and all...but you know I don't care for “fast food” solutions).

Though there are many qualified and wonderful Reiki Master Teachers out there, maybe you just don't seem to click with any of them. Luckily, I have the good fortune of finding two Reiki Masters – one right near by, and one from a distance – and they click with 99.9% of Reiki Seekers. Karina Carr, my Reiki Master, just has that peace about her that is contagious! Her attunements are Divine, if you'll pardon the pun...Divine Reiki is her own creation, of course!

Today, though, I'm going to put the spotlight on the one from a distance: a fascinating woman by the name of Alice Langholt.

Alice is a Reiki Master Teacher of a division of Reiki called Kundalini Reiki. What's the difference between Kundalini Reiki and Usui Reiki (AKA Usui Shiki Ryoho)? Her website elaborates on this – and I will add my comments in comparison to Divine Reiki in parentheses:

Kundalini Reiki is a Reiki offshoot developed by Ole Gabrielsen (Divine Reiki was developed by Karina Carr). It is said to use a combination of the practitioner’s Kundalini energy with Reiki energy in healing treatments (Divine Reiki combines Reiki Energy with the unending Wellspring of Hado/Love Energy that occurs naturally in all of us). Kundalini energy is spiritual energy that comes up from the earth through a person’s chakra system – from the root up through all of the chakras, and out the crown chakra. Reiki energy flows from above the crown chakra down through the body and out of the hands of the practitioner to a recipient. (Hado springs from within and is the energy transmitted through the intention of kindness. Example: you make an old family recipe, like Grandma's cookies, but they don't taste the same...yet you followed her recipe to the letter. Well, Grandma's Hado is what makes them taste different. They were made with her own personal energy and marked with love. Your cookies will taste this way if you make them with the intention of love for another person.)

Kundalini Reiki does not initiate a full Kundalini awakening, which can be dangerous and cause painful emotional and spiritual symptoms. Kundalini Reiki is said to be able to help heal the symptoms of an accidental Kundalini Awakening. (Divine Reiki can offer similar benefits, and it works on the idea that the intelligence of the energy itself will flow to where it needs to be rather than being directed.)

Kundalini Reiki is different from traditional Usui Shiki Ryoho practice on many accounts. Kundalini Reiki is much simpler to learn and use, and also very effective. Directly from Alice's website, are some ways in which it is different from Usui Shiki Ryoho (Divine Reiki is primarily an Usui Shiki Ryoho System):

There are no symbols. No symbols need to be learned, intended or used when doing a hands-on or distance treatment with Kundalini Reiki.

There are no hand positions. The practitioner simply places the hands on the shoulders of the recipient, or holds the hands steady for a distance sending. He intends to give/send Kundalini Reiki, and the energy immediately flows, treating all areas in the recipient that need healing. The manual gives an analogy to throwing a bucket of water over a road with a bunch of potholes. The water will gather into each hole without being individually poured into each one. So with the energy, going where it is needed without being directed to each individual spot. The flow of energy stops when it is done. (Author's note: This is an excellent type of Reiki for people who have had problems in the past with inappropriate touching. Divine Reiki will also go where it needs to go without direction/intention.)

Treatments take the practitioner an average of 5 – 7 minutes. The recipient may feel the energy for up to an hour. Traditional Reiki treatments can take 30-90 minutes. Whether hands-on or distance treatments, Kundalini Reiki channels a treatment that takes the practitioner 5 minutes, but continues for the recipient for up to an hour, depending on how much energy is needed. Each recipient receives exactly as much energy as he or she needs. The energy simply stops flowing when the treatment is finished, and the practitioner can feel the energy starting and stopping.
Attunements are given as treatments, via intention. The practitioner simply says that he intends that (person’s name) be attuned to Kundalini Reiki level (number) when he is ready to receive the attunement. The recipient intends to receive the attunement when ready. The intent to receive activates the start of the attunement. That’s it.

The most interesting difference between Kundalini Reiki is that it can be given exact intention for a specific problem (releasing pain, solutions to a problem becoming clear, etc.). While Divine Reiki can be given some direction, it will also go places we mere mortals cannot perceive as an issue. Divine Reiki is good for the unseen issues and problems that even the client may not see.

Both Divine Reiki and Kundalini Reiki are highly desirable – I choose both to have under my belt of mastery. Both are in the ideal price range (not too cheap, not too expensive), and require commitment, intention, and study. Whichever you choose, you will definitely be on the right track to spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

Reference
Langholt, A. The Difference Between Kundalini Reiki and Usui Reiki. Retrieved from the Web February 17, 2010 from http://reikiawakening.com/resources.html.

2010-01-18T22:16:00.001-05:00

How to avoid a McReiki Encounter

This entry is a break from my Seven Great Spiritual Questions and turns to finding a Reiki Master Teacher who is suitable and legitimate.

I call it a “McReiki” encounter because so many people are under the impression that things need to be done quickly and in great volume. This is not the case for Reiki. Even though an attunement (something only a Master Teacher can do for his or her students) only takes a few moments, learning and working with Reiki can be a long endeavor requiring study and practice. But don't let that deter you – Reiki is infinitely rewarding!

There are several considerations when determining whether or not a school of Reiki is going to be helpful to you or not.

1. A Reiki attunement takes under an hour – but attaining level mastery takes much longer.

My Reiki Master-Teacher, Karina Carr, gave me my first and second level lessons one year apart. The attunements took a short time. The first level and second level took time to work on and gain experience. In either February or March, I should be ready to take the final attunement to become a Reiki Master. From that point forward, I will be able to fully teach and guide others into the healing world of Usui Shiki Ryoho – but I will also require a great deal of practice and patience. Karina will guide me throughout that first year of mastery, available to answer my questions and share her own experiences. Therefore, be wary of RMT's that promise you will be a complete master in just three weekends. While they are technically correct (insofar as giving attunements), the reality is that no one becomes a master of anything in a matter of days.

2. Beware of pricing – not too cheap and not too expensive.

Reiki sometimes gets an unfortunate bad rap because there are those who choose to charge tens of thousands of dollars to teach and give attunements. There are pros and cons to this, and the reasons why vary from RMT to RMT. Don't be afraid to do a little comparison shopping among Reiki workshops...but always give it due consideration along with the other factors when choosing. Is it affordable? Do you get individual attention? Is the class overly large?

3. Class size – how many is too many?

The size of a class will affect the quality of learning in any class, but this is especially true of a Reiki class. If you can get a teacher to take you in for individual lessons, take it! It will be a bit more expensive, but the personal attention is well worth the cost. However, a more affordable alternative is a Reiki workshop – but be sure the class size doesn't go over 10 per RMT. If there are two RMTs teaching together, then a class can get to about 20 – 25 without taking away from the learning experience.

4. Appropriate and professional behavior!

Look for an RMT who behaves in a professional manner – if you are uncomfortable at any time, you should be able to say so and have the RMT react in a gentle and kind manner. You should never feel threatened, condescended, or embarrassed around a true Reiki professional.

While Reiki is not regulated by the government, it is a self-monitored and certified profession. Before jumping in, you may want to check out the International Association of Reiki Professionals (iarp.org) when searching for someone in your area to teach you the system. Always follow your instincts and your best judgment, and you too can enjoy the benefits of all that Reiki has to offer.

Namasté,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions - 6 of 7

2010-01-10T14:25:00.003-05:00

6. Where can I find God?

I found this question to be rather odd when I was a little girl.

For me, when I was about six, this answer was self evident - God could easily be found in church. He was there, waiting for me to show Him my nice dresses and shoes. It was like visiting a grandparent who welcomed you into His great palace (I was raised Roman Catholic). To me, God was a very kind being.

Then I found out from one of the Nuns that God had a special talent...called "Omnipresence." He had the ability to be everywhere, all at once. I found this absolutely delightful. That meant that God would be with me, even when coming home from church, or going to school. It lent me great comfort.

But when I was about 15 years old, church, the institution, turned its back on me. I was mistaken, because I thought that the church was God, too...with that Omnipresence, why not?

So, I started to explore other religious views that would embrace me as I was created. I could not believe in a God who would create me a certain way only to abandon me to the fires of Hell, despite the fact that I had accepted Jesus.

I studied the equally religious beliefs of Islam as a comparison to Christianity - I felt it did not fit what I wanted. I studied Greek Mythology, ancient Egyptian beliefs, Druid beliefs, general Paganism, Neo-Paganism, Spiritualism, Wicca, and finally settled on Buddhism. For quite a while, I felt better about myself, peaceful.

Then I moved away from where I practiced, and I learned that not all Buddhism was the same. Shingon Esoteric Buddhism had provided me a very personal, intense connection to God. Had I found Him again, only to lose Him once I moved away to a place where people thought that Shingon was a type of Sushi?

I tried embracing some of my Roman Catholic roots again. That helped. I started studying Zen. That helped. I added back my Native American "pagan" beliefs. That helped. But nothing was enough. Nothing slaked my thirst to be friends with God again. To feel His love the way I did when I was a little girl.

Then, a while back, I realized what I had been doing wrong.

Studying everything that humanity's religions has to offer is fine. Seeking outward and through tradition to find beliefs...that's fine, too. But it isn't enough.

Religion is created by humans, for humans. We can study anything written or spoken, and believe it is inspired by "God," but it will always come down to a human interpretation of inspiration. Humans are flawed, and there is, without fail, something that fails to translate. But that's okay! It's human nature...the imperfect reaching out to the perfect will inevitably have a disconnect. The point is, at least we are searching.

In my journey to find God, I finally turned inward. How do I feel about God? Has It really abandoned me? Is God male, female, gender neutral, or bi-gendered? I took the knowledge from the outward, and turned it inward. God is omnipresent, and if that is so, then I can only absorb the answers that feel right to me, and throw out the rest.

After all, what leads people to convert from Buddhism to Christianity, or vice versa? Is it simply pure manipulation from the other party, or does something ring true to the listener? In some cases, unfortunately, it is the former, and in other cases, it is the latter. Something about the message cries out to the listener, and the person can no longer remain satisfied with his or her current beliefs. So where does this change occur? Outside? I find that difficult to believe. The more I studied, the more despondent I became. All religions seemed to have elements of the truth, but there was no One Truth. It was only when I looked within, that the beliefs all came together to form a cohesive structure in which I could believe.

So when people ask me what's my religion...I have but one answer...

"I believe."

Let someone else do the interpretation.

So where is God?

God is everywhere, everything - science, technology, evolution, art, death, life, the seasons...it's all Good. It's all God.

You just have to know where to look.

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions – 5 of 7

2009-08-30T19:59:00.001-04:00

5. What does God want me to do?

This is a question I've been asking myself a lot lately. Since the disappearance of one of my beloved cats, Jeff, I have wondered what part of “the plan” this would fall under.

Does the Universe even have a plan? Well, I believe it does. All I have to do is take a look at how the world works to know there is careful planning involved. The Fibonacci Numbers are fascinating “evidence” of this plan to me (I don't claim to know the plan, so don't ask!). 0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55, 89, 144...and so on ad infinitum. This sequence appears all over our natural world, for example, the arrangement of leaves on a stem, the fruitlets of a pineapple, the flowering of an artichoke, and even the pine cone. I'm not going to include the proofs here, because I am far from a mathematician, so I encourage everyone to read and research this phenomenon on their own.

So I ask the Universe, in all of its possibilities, where do I fit into its fabric? I seek, but how do I find? I read all sorts of holy texts, existentialist works, and meditate. I do Yoga, Reiki, and Qi-Gong...and it leads me to an answer. My answer. I believe that I have been written into the Universe's story, God's story, or woven into the fabric of All. I am here to bring light to the darkness. I am here to heal.

How I discovered this about myself comes from a long time of asking questions and pondering the nature of things. I believe in infinite possibilities. Going back to the sad tale of my missing cat, Jeff, provides some insight into how and what I believe.

All animals, including humans, tend toward growth when we are healthy, and tend toward wilting when we are sick. This sickness can invade us on more than just the physical level. We can be sick mentally and spiritually as well. My cat Jeff has a sickness on the mental level...he was abandoned as a 2-day old kitten and grew up in a cage at the shelter with very little human contact. There was just not enough time in the day for the volunteers and workers at the shelter to spend on him...so he became very wary of loud noises, deep sighs, laughter, and being petted. He refuses to be held and only trusts one entire human being in the world. My loving partner.

They've developed a special bond over the time he was here in the house. He was even able to spend most of the night sleeping by her side (which took a lot of trust on his part, not to mention a lot of love and kindness on hers). Then, one night, our building's fire alarm went off (our neighbors had a grease fire that got out of hand – no one was hurt physically, though), and we had to bring him outside. Controlled by his fear, he leapt out of my partner's arms and ran off...and hasn't returned since. We can't find him, or even hear him cry. He's just vanished. We are still going through the grief of not knowing his whereabouts, or if he is alive.

Being a healer, I send Reiki to his situation, that, no matter where he is, he is well, safe, and happy with his choice that was made out of fear. In his plan, the plan that God has for him, he is to run away...to learn lessons, I suppose. I believe that his fabric, like mine, is woven into the great pattern of the Universe. He has his own story, his own journey, that he must continue. The Dalai Lama once said it is difficult for some animals to think clearly, but they are capable of it (just think of the animals who have saved lives of human companions).

So many of us are like Jeff. We act reflexively out of fear of being hurt or further traumatized. We are stuck in our pasts and can't see our present. We don't accept responsibility for our selves. We have free will. Though the Universe does have a plan for all its creatures, we can choose whether we will work with that plan. Conflict arises when we rail against our plans...when we abuse each other, when we hurt ourselves...when we go against the design for which we were created.

Whenever I go against the plan, things around me get very chaotic...and I get very stressed out – usually because I'm not listening to that still inner voice that gently guides me in the right direction. Recently, while feeling chaotic, and feeling sorry for myself, I emailed my mother (who is a very spiritual person, a loving Christian, and just a generally tough cookie) that I was running out of patience. Her reply was blessed, and exactly what I needed to hear. “One thing about having hard times, is it makes us more resourceful and more successful in our lives. You both (my partner and I) have so much to offer this sad world of ours.”

I realized, through her words, that she was right, and I was getting closer to fulfilling my purpose. If I looked at it differently, through fresh eyes, rather than self-pitying eyes, I could see my goals coming together. It gave me the boost I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and start doing things that add joy to the world (the last thing we need is more sorrow, right?). God (however you know the name) has infinite patience while we figure out what we're here for...but we don't have infinite time to figure it out (or maybe we do...hmmm...topic for later discussion?), so we need to take responsibility for our selves, and do what we can to make a positive impact.

The purpose you were built for belongs to you, and you alone. Seeking it is entirely your journey, your responsibility.

Time to go hunting. ;)

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions – 4 of 7

2009-08-25T09:17:00.002-04:00

4. What is the purpose of life?

This question is on a much larger scale than the question of why we are here. Life in general...all life...may or may not have a purpose. For this blogger, it has a purpose. I reason that the Universe, with Its precise, mathematical chaos, has a purpose. Is it a concious purpose? Perhaps. I am not so self-centered or anthrophilic as to believe that humans are the only ones with conciousness. That presupposes much about the nature of everything, though. So, being a person who likes to consider all sides of a question, I'll try to start with some simple concepts, break it down, make it complicated, and then answer it in the best blind fashion possible. :) After all, what we are, all of us, whether we are scientists, philosophers, or holy people, we are blind – stumbling in the dark to make sense of our world as we perceive it.

This is not to say that any of these perspectives lack value. In fact, science is invaluable to understanding how the Universe works. Perhaps, with an explanation of how, we can get closer to the why. Garrett Lisi's Theory of Everything, for example, may be promising enough to tie in how our Universe works...an overarching explanation to unite all the particles and forces of the cosmos. Still in its birth stages, this Theory may very well come to be known and accepted in the future. This would explain quite a bit. But would it explain why?

No, because that's not the job of science. Science explains how – and that's all – it does not explain why, and that's good – that's where philosophers and shamans come in, right? Certainly!

For me, knowing the Theory of Everything would help me understand the why in some way...knowing the “mind of God” in a manner of speaking. It's like looking at a piece of fine art – knowing how the artist painted it (materials, time spent) helps me understand the inspiration behind it. Looking at the creation helps me to understand the creator. That's just me...

Well, all this dancing around the question, circling the airport...and I still haven't gotten to the heart of the matter. What is the purpose of life?

In my short time on this earth (in this life, anyway), I keep coming back to the same answer. The purpose of life is to continue. That's all there is to it...the purpose of life is to BE – to EXPERIENCE it for the sake of itself. To live!

I recently encountered a delightful person on Twitter who has a website regarding life after death and his own near death experience. I highly encourage all of you to read his message. It really does help increase our understanding regarding life after death. http://www.dharma-talks.com/. It is an amazing account.

However, I don't wish to dwell too much on the afterlife...but, it's fascinating to know that life simply perpetuates. Life continues. Life IS.

Enjoy.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Reference

Highfield, R. (2007). Surfer dude stuns physicists with theory of everything. Telegraph.co.uk. November 14, 2007. Retrieved from the Web August 14, 2009 from http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/large-hadron-collider/3314456/Surfer-dude-stuns-physicists-with-theory-of-everything.html.

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions – 3 of 7

2009-07-30T00:24:00.002-04:00

3. Why am I here?

Asking why a person exists can be one of the most challenging, frustrating, and enjoyable explorations a person can ever take. It is challenging in that the question asks you to find your spot in the world (if not in the Universe), and accept it, embrace it, or change it. It is frustrating to feel as if you do not have a spot in the world, and feel that life has no purpose. Yet it is enjoyable when you finally decide to step into yourself, and figure out your unique purpose.

This question can only be answered by one person: yourself. So, instead of telling you how you're supposed to figure it all out, I'll share with you how I've discovered my life's purpose. The journey has not always been pleasant, but the rewards from the hard work are worth more than gold. (I'll also try to keep it brief...you need a guide, not a novel.)

So instead of starting at the beginning, let's start at the middle. There was a point when I was living in Tampa, Florida and enjoyed the company of two of the best people I've ever known in my lifetime. One was a fervent Atheist who was always challenging me to think with an Existential bend, and understand the Universe through Science. His skepticism was beneficial – it taught me to question everything. Another good friend was an Earth Goddess come to human form as my best friend and sister – she was and is an explorer of mysteries great and small. I learned from her how to accept things whether they were positive or negative – that sometimes, you just have to let things BE.

At any rate, it was a point in my life where I was waffling about what I wanted out of life. I was in a good job, but I felt like I wasn't really fulfilled. I wanted to be a doctor, a nurse...something that would help others...but I didn't feel I had the stomach for surgery or the physical wearwithall to handle being a nurse (my mother is a nurse and I know firsthand it takes nearly superhuman stamina). But what could I do?

That's when my Athiest friend introduced me to a film called, What the Bleep Do We Know?. A scientific and spiritual intersecting film, it was a message from the Universe from the moment the film opened. It reminded me that I am one of infinite possibilities in the vast Universe. That I, in my smallness, could make an impact...if only I could step out of my mindset and reach out to Great Spirit to guide me.

And guide me it did. I began researching helping professions, and settled my sights on something I hadn't looked into since I was fifteen years old (I was 28 at the time) – counseling psychology.

From that moment, it was like a landslide of perfect placement. I found a school that accepted me and had online courses for my masters, and even allowed me to transfer some of those credits when I transferred to Atlanta. However, I felt it still wasn't enough. The psychology was great...but it lacked the spiritual component I craved.

That's when I met my Reiki Master. She was at the place I worked, and I came to her seeking help. She saw something special in me, and took me under her wing. Now, I am a level II practitioner, working on becoming a Reiki Master, myself. Her patient and loving teaching has helped me add the final component to fulfilling my life's purpose – to bring Reiki and Psychology together and allow it to touch the world.

Recently, I felt yet another hole open up in my heart regarding my life's purpose. Again, I felt I was missing a piece of the puzzle. By now, I have learned that when this happens, I need to reach out to the Universe (or God, or Great Spirit/Mystery, what you choose to call it is fine, of course) for answers.

The answer came to me in the form of a colleague. A colleague who is currently working to develop his unique brand of therapy (the same thing I am working toward). He was able to help me heal some very painful spiritual hurts that I had that were from my orientation and organized religion. It was a painful process, but it was exactly what Great Spirit intended for me.

I am now on yet another fork in the road...finding out how I will help others in the quest to fulfilling my life's purpose. It is my hope that you will read this, and it will give you some insight on how you would like to fit into the Universe. After all, your birth is one possibility in a Universe of infinite possibilities...it's no accident that you're here.

Give yourself a chance to make meaning.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

For Further Learning:

http://www.one-purpose.com/Home%20.html

http://www.whatthebleep.com/

http://www.quantumconsciousness.org/

http://www.chopra.com/

Author's Note: I am unable to recommend anything written by Rev. Rick Warren due to his discriminatory stance against the Gay and Lesbian community. It was with great sadness that I learned of his prejudice, and I continue to pray for him that Great Spirit will help him understand the damage he is doing to Christ's message of love and acceptance.

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions: 2 of 7

2009-07-28T07:20:00.001-04:00

2. Is there life after death?

This is a question, that, for many people, is frightening to explore and consider all the possibilities. For this question, I ask you, my readers, to come with me for a while. I will hold your hand through this journey, and it will be okay.

My answers to this question stem from several components – first-hand research, my personal experiences, and intense literature review over the past 13 years.

The question itself does not literally mean 'is there life after death?', rather, it is more accurate to ask, 'does conciousness survive death?' Life always follows death, as we can see with our own eyes when watching a body decompose – it feeds the flies, maggots, and is even supplemental fertilizer for the Earth...it naturally follows a cycle of life. Without death, the world would be grossly overpopulated, and would die itself. However, even if that were to happen, it would still yield to yet another cycle of life forming. Life will always find a way in this Great Mystery.

Death is inevitable – not one of us reading this will live forever (nor will the author!). We are all in this together. Let this be a sobering, yet comforting thought: you are not alone in this journey. The question here is...what happens next?

Clarifying the question is paramount to answering it...just what are we trying to answer? For as long as there have been humans who could pass stories, traditions, and history on to subsequent generations, this idea of conciousness surviving death has been questioned. Some people reject it after exploring it, deciding that this life is enough, and to get the most out of it while they are here, leaving a mark on society that will keep their memory alive for generations to come. I call that the Humanistic-Atheist perspective (it is widely accepted as Existentialist, but I have met many Existentialists who believe in an afterlife but do not stress its importance) – people who live life as if this is the only one, but refuse to be amoral. In fact, they are moral and ethical for the very sake of the credo, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” For those of you reading who have already come to the conclusion of no afterlife or that the afterlife is not important, you may wish to skip right to the “Further Reading/Reference” section and see the book I recommend by Irvin Yalom (it is absolutely brilliant). I hope you will keep reading, though!

Yet many others believe in some sort of afterlife – some believe it is an actual place where they will be judged for their life on Earth, and then sent to a place of good (“Heaven”) or evil (“Hell”). Some believe the afterlife is merely a next step toward rebirth in another human form until enlightenment is attained. Still others belive that the afterlife is a journey into exploring the Universe for eternity. The Dalai Lama discusses the Buddhist understanding of death and what he calls, “layers of conciousness.” Whatever the belief, there still seems to be a search for something...a notion that the conciousness survives bodily death. So wouldn't that seem to point toward a truth? That there is some sort of life after death?

A friend of mine put it into an analogy. “No one ever talks about Earth's three moons.” Naturally, because Earth has only one moon (that is a fact as of this writing). We don't keep aeons of dialog over something that doesn't exist, right? That doesn't mean that any particular belief is the correct one, however...but it may mean that something is there, to be discovered.

Some scientists assert that there is a specific hallucination that happens when oxygen is cut off from the brain, leaving a visual “tunnel” that is mistaken for the “tunnel with light at the end.” However, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross conducted extensive research with individuals who had Near-Death Experiences (NDE), including a large population of those who had been blind for more than 10 years (meaning there was no ocular activity – complete blindness). Those who had no vision were able to describe the colors of the shirts and ties the doctor was wearing during bodily resuscitative measures. In other words...they could SEE the people trying to revive them back into their bodies. Impossible to explain off as an hallucination, eh?

The first time I saw a cadaver was when my father died (13 years ago, which sparked my exploration into Thanatology, the study of death – I'd been interested in it prior to this incident, but this is the marker that set me on this journey).

A vital, robust man with sparkling blue eyes and a quick wit, my father was a man who was willing to offer a smile and help others in need. He was very much full of life, a man who played Santa Claus at the local country store at Christmas – and played it well!

He died in surgery from an aortic aneurysm that was not reparable – over 40 years of smoking damaged his arteries beyond repair. We requested to see the cadaver in the chapel to cement the fact that he was dead and to say our goodbyes. But when I went into the chapel, my father wasn't there...his body was...it looked like him...but there was no “him” in there. The waxy skin, the cold rigors settling in, the gruesome post-surgical swelling all conspired to send me a distinct message: my father was not in there anymore. I remembered what he once told me. “All it is, Anne, is a shell...when we are dead, we leave nothing but an empty container.”

Where was he, then? When, exactly, did his conciousness leave his body? After all, he was under anesthesia, but his physical death was not declared until nearly 14 hours later. So what the heck happened? Did he see the tunnel? When did he decide to go? Did he get to decide?

Obviously, these questions are not answered easily, and are not likely to be answered in my lifetime. However, the questions came to be of importance to more than just a young woman whose father died. Stuart Hameroff M.D., Professor, Departments of Anesthesiology and Psychology and Director of the Center for Consciousness Studies at The University of Arizona also posed some of these questions while his patients were under anesthesia. He sets about answering them at his website,
http://www.consciousness.arizona.edu/hameroff. It's worth a look when you have a moment.

All things considered, I have come to the conclusion that the conciousness survives death, but it won't be like anything I could ever anticipate. It will set me toward a wonderous journey into Great Mystery as I go further forward to attain oneness with “God.” I don't need to worry about death, because I only have this present moment...the here and now. Now. This moment. I can relish it, cry through it, laugh through it, love through it, and live through it...but I cannot relive it. So, I will just experience it instead, and make my mark on this world as best I can. Being here now is all we have, regardless of an afterlife or extinguishing of conciousness.

So enjoy your journey, and make it a fruitful one.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

References/For Further Reading:

Chopra, Deepak (2006). Life After Death: The Burden of Proof. Harmony Publishing: Chatsworth, CA.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama (2002). Advice on Dying: And Living a Better Life. Atria Books: New York.

Kübler-Ross, Elisabeth (2008). On Life After Death. Celestial Arts: Berkeley.

Ibid (1999). The Tunnel and The Light: Essential Insights on Living and Dying with a Letter to a Child with Cancer. Marlowe & Company: New York.

Ibid (1997). The Wheel of Life: A Memoir of Living and Dying. Touchstone: New York.

Ibid (1982). Remember the Secret. Tricycle Press: Berkeley.

Moody, Raymond A. (2001) Life After Life: The Investigation of a Phenomenon – Survival of Bodily Death. Harper Collins: New York.

Peake, Anthony (2009). Is there Life after Death?: Why Science is Taking the Idea of an Afterlife Seriously. Arcturus Publishing Ltd.: London.

Yalom, Irvin (2008). Staring at the Sun: Overcoming the Terror of Death. Jossey-Bass: New York.

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions: 1 of 7

2009-07-07T01:57:00.000-04:00

1. Does God exist?

It seems we'll be starting off these questions with "The Big One" – does God exist? There are so many ways to answer this question, I think. A simple yes or no isn't possible, though. We simply don't know the answer to this question. Or do we?

Is it even possible to answer this question? Do we answer the question as individuals, as a collective, based on observations, feelings, common sense? My common sense differs from your common sense, and so on and so forth. We can examine this question through so many filters...psychological, physiological, spiritual, philosophical, and scientific. First, though, I feel I must answer this question with a question: does it matter if God exists?

I have many friends who are "hard core" Atheists – they typically either stopped believing in God at a certain age, or they never considered the possibility of God in the Judeo-Christian sense. Some friends of mine are Agnostic, and consider themselves in search of the truth of God...whether that means existense of a god-deity, a force that flows through all of creation, or if the universe is nothing more than a happy accident. Both groups of friends lead happy and fulfilled lives, experience good times and bad, and feel connected to something greater than themselves through social networks, charitable deeds, and random acts of kindness. They are not "punished" for their disbelief or questioning, any more than anyone else on this earth is...good things and bad things happen to them just as they happen to a "believer." They are not interested in life after death, because they are focused on the present, and making life enjoyable as it is now. I commend that. I support it. I am amazed by it, because it is not something I understand. But, given this answer, it would seem to be that it does not matter if God exists...yet it does to me.

So the question itself might not matter in the long run, but it is a personal question. I am a questioner, searching for answers. Even though I have plenty of answers that I am satisfied with, and I do believe that God exists, I will continue to question in order to understand the Universe that surrounds me. From here forward, I will continue this essay explaining how God exists to me in my experience, as I've already established that I believe God does exist. Interestingly enough, just because I believe God exists does not answer the question itself. :) My history of religious exploration and development starts from when I was a child. I was raised Catholic until age 11, when my parents went to a Southern Baptist church. This was not a conservative church, however, as they honored what is called "the priesthood of the believer." This is the ideology that no person needs to go through a priest to meet God, nor do they have to swallow everything the Reverend puts out during a sermon. If it doesn't make sense to you, don't practice it, provided you obey the basic precepts of the Christian faith – particularly "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

I continued to question my beliefs, though. God as a single deity didn't seem to make much sense to me. The Universe was a gigantic place, with infinite possibilities. Plus, what about all the world religions that existed alongside of Christianity? Could they all be wrong? What about all the religions that existed before Christ came to earth? I could not accept that everyone else was wrong and there was only one way to believe. I could not believe in a God that was petty and jealous...it seemed too politcal for a being that created the entire universe. Also, I didn't appreciate the growing divide between religion and science. I prefer the Big Bang and Evolutionary theories over the Creationist story, and I could not see the logic in Creationism. From there, I started exploring Wicca, which gave me the freedom to see God in multiple forms, such as a Goddess, the Earth Herself, and to see God in nature. Yet even that didn't answer my quest for knowing God. Then my father passed away – and once again I had my doubts about what God was – that it all was just an accident and we just lived and died and there was nothing more. I caved under the weight of grief of all the people I lost in my life. When I turned inward, and began studying Buddhism, I started to find answers...not just in one religion, but in all of them.

God is not a specific being looking down on us waiting to see if we will behave properly and then reward or punish us for our good deeds or misdeeds. I say this because of my own observations on how my Atheist and Agnostic friends live. Now, one can argue that those friends will be served a fiery punishment at the hands of Satan once they are dead, but based on my past, I cannot look at the vastness of the universe and accept that any God would be inclined toward all-or-nothing thinking. God is much more than our conciousness can comprehend. God is a force that flows through every one of us, is something we can connect with by connecting with each other, engaging in prayer, looking within, and reaching out to that mystery. It has no gender, and is all gender, it has no form, and is all forms.

While you consider this, consider the enormity of the universe, and the mystery that lies ahead of you in your lifetime. Live in the paradox, live in the mystery.

For me, God exists no matter what we name it – Universe, Jesus, Buddha, Allah, Great Spirit, Gaia. What matters is that we are comfortable with our own answers and aren't afraid to seek more.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

The Seven Great Spiritual Questions

2009-07-04T02:55:00.002-04:00

A friend of mine whom I consider a modern day Shaman, told me of the seven "Great Spiritual Questions" that he considered to be important. He sent them to me to see what my answers would be. I decided they were too good not to share with my blog friends, so I've decided to address all seven in a seven-part series.

In the meantime, my mother came up with seven of her own. I thought they were absolutely delightful and worth asking. Kind bloggers, I would like to reach out to you and ask you to develop your own seven.

We'll begin with question one next week. In the interim, for my fellow Americans, have a safe and happy Independence Day. To my International friends, peace and blessings.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Reiki and Medicine

2009-06-22T02:07:00.002-04:00

I don't want people getting the idea that I am anti-conventional medicine. I'm actually in favor of anything that works and is safe and effective. For the most part, Western medicine is safe and effective when used responsibly.

Reiki is never intended to replace conventional medicine, which is why it is referred to as "Complementary Alternative Medicine," or CAM. Reiki is used to enhance treatment outcomes, to complement conventional medicine, and to boost the healing effects of medicine through energy work. It is safe to use and has no contraindications.

Such is the case with mental illnesses and disorders. When working with clients who suffer from any kind of issue, Reiki can be used to help the client de-stress and be more open to interventions used by therapists.

Reiki is useful with conditions such as autism, depression, panic disorder, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder when used in conjunction with traditional interventions. Reiki can help clients get past "stuck points" or impasse, which enhances the outcomes of treatment. It is also useful for healing past trauma, and helping subdue recent trauma so that the necessary work can be completed through conventional therapeutic means.

Reiki can enhance so many aspects of mind, body, and spirit with its gentle vibrations, and can be used with any medicine or intervention. The next time you seek treatment for something, think about adding Reiki to your routine. It might make the experience even better than you expected.

To your health,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Yoga & Teens: A Phenomenal Combination

2009-06-17T15:42:00.002-04:00

ADHD/ODD/Autism...all are associated with childhood disorders. We throw pills at our children without even knowing if it is truly safe for them as they develop. We watch our teens transition into adults, not understanding balance, moderation, or responsibility. We feel helpless to do anything about our drugged out kids.

Yoga is one answer.

According to the Yoga Sutras, "Yoga is the cessation of the fluctuation of thought." Indeed it is, especially with the more advanced poses. When you are practicing yoga, and it is time to do something as "simple" as Tree Pose, it takes a great deal of focus on keeping in balance. When the mind is focused on holding a pose, all thoughts are drawn together, keeping the body in harmony with the mind in order to avoid falling down.

This is why yoga can be so beneficial for our adolescents. Not only is it good for their health, it's good for learning how to focus. Yoga By Teens (DVD) illustrates the mind-body connection in an appealing Hatha Yoga practice done entirely by three teenagers.

Yoga helps build self-esteem, which is vital for teens, whose hormones are raging, bombarded by messages of false perfection and images no living being can achieve (not even the models who are supposedly ideal).

A cost-effective way to get teens into yoga is to host a "Yoga Party" in your home. Select a DVD that is aimed toward teenagers and teaches yoga. Clear a space for five or six teens to fit comfortably doing poses. Offer juice and fruit for snacks, start the DVD, and leave the room so they can practice on their own without feeling self-concious.

Yoga can provide teens a healthy outlet for a multitude of issues - physical, mental, and spiritual. Yoga is fun, funny, chic, and timeless.

Bring some Yoga home today for your teens...they might not thank you right away, but they will evenutally, and you will know you've done the very best thing for them.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Love, Spirit, and the Human Connection: By Request

2009-06-11T02:31:00.000-04:00

This segment discusses the average human's need to connect with others for health and longevity. The exception to this would be hermits, who choose a life of solitude for a variety of reasons. But let's just keep this narrowly focused toward the average Joe and Jane, or Joe and Joe, or Jane and Jane, who are just looking to make a connection to another person.

Since studies reviewed by Hojat (2007) completed in 2006, studies continue to show a relation between human compassion and increased positive patient outcomes. Reaching out to our clients in clinical settings with empathy and unconditional positive regard helps people relax, comply with medication and treatment, and increases the health and well-being of patients seeking treatment.

But this attitude of love and connectedness needs to go beyond clinical settings, and into our everyday lives. Taking this attitude can be difficult when you've been hurt repeatedly. It's difficult to reach out to someone, only to be slapped away by the cruelties of human behavior (being cheated on would be an extreme example, being gossiped about a lesser example, but still a betrayal of trust).

So how do you move on from these trespasses? How do you continue to reach out after being hurt or betrayed? It's not an easy process, by any stretch of the imagination, and it takes time to heal. But it can be done. I know from experience. My own experience, and those of my loved ones.

First, take a moment to forgive. (Forgive? Who? The person who hurt me? Never!) Actually, there are multiple people to forgive in this situation...and it's not necessarily for the reasons you might think.

The first person to forgive after facing a betrayal is yourself. A lot of us blame ourselves when we get hurt. (Why didn't I see that coming? How could I have been so stupid?) STOP these thoughts. They are not good for you. You don't deserve to beat yourself up for a simple reaching out for human affection and love. In fact, you were hurt, and you have learned from the experience. Find the lesson. Forgive yourself. Appreciate yourself for surviving the bump in the road, and keep moving forward.

The second person to forgive is the person who has hurt you. (Why on earth would I do that? I'm just supposed to excuse their behavior toward me?) No, absolutely not. Forgiveness is not a dismissal of bad behavior. It is not allowing a person back in to hurt you again...it is letting go of anger, and the power that person has over you to hurt you. When the betrayal has been severe, the harder it is and the longer it takes to let go...but it is the most necessary thing you can do in order to move on with your life. Write them a nasty letter and burn it (don't send it and fuel the fire), then write them a letter of forgiveness. Do what it takes to let go and move on – not for the person who betrayed you, but for yourself. Do it because you need to make better connections with people who are deserving of your love and affection.

Once you've accomplished this...it's time to seek out companionship with people and learn to trust again. Not an easy task, but possible. Go to places where you feel fulfilled – the bookstore, nature hikes with groups, the museum, the zoo, amusement parks. Join a book club, a spirituality group, anything that piques your interest...just to meet others who share your passions. It's good for you!

Every time you reach out to someone, it is a risk. Taking the risk is worth it, especially when you find a person or people who share your interests, and reciprocate the connection you make with them.

Let your spirit reach out to others – you never know what is in store for you, your health, and your journey.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

References

Hojat, M. (2007). Empathy in Patient Care: Antecedents, Development, Measurement, and Outcomes. New York: Springer Science Publishing.

So What is Transpersonal Psychology? - By Request

2009-06-04T15:35:00.004-04:00

My readers have asked for a definition of Transpersonal Psychology and its applications to therapy. So, without further ado, here is a brief definition with my opinions interspersed.

Transpersonal Psychology is considered a Spiritual Psychology. It can be defined as a blend of Humanistic (Rogerian), Existential, Jungian, and Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. It goes beyond the Mind-Body connection and into Mind-Body-Spirit. It helps people who are in need of transcendance outside the bounds of formal religion.

Transpersonal Psychology helps people who are in spiritual crisis, are near death (hospice, for example), and even those who are atheist but seeking something beyond the self. Transpersonal Psychologists seek to integrate all aspects of being into one - to maintain discussions of that which is unseen, and to help others find their Higher Selves.

Furthermore, Transpersonal Psychology seeks to explain that which is considered Paranormal. For example, if a family believes their house is haunted, they can seek counseling without fear that they will be invountarily committed for what some society considers "outlandish beliefs." In our office, they will be believed for the experience, and helped in a manner that will teach them to help themselves prove or disprove a haunting, so that they can get on with their lives.

Transpersonal Psychologists employ interventions that can help a client move through things on multi-levels. This is helpful for clients who have tried conventional counseling and still can't move on--as if they are stuck at an impasse. We use techniques such as the Gestalt "empty chair," Yoga, Aikido, Reiki, or whatever we are well-versed in so that the client can move forward with their particular issues.

John Davis, PhD, is an author who uses Transpersonal Psychology in his practice, and defines it as such: "The central concept in Transpersonal Psychology is self-transcendence, or a sense of self-identity which is deeper or higher, broader, and more unified with the whole. The root of the term, transpersonal or literally "beyond the mask," refers to this self-transcendence. While this self-transcendence recognizes a value to the personal, it also holds nonduality and the transpersonal as the more fundamental ground of being and consciousness."

This is one of the best definitions I have ever found because of its flexibility for the client. It allows any person, whatever they believe, to go beyond the self and become unified on all levels. It's what I hope to do for others, very soon.

For further reading, please visit his website here.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

A Very Brief History of Reiki, By Request

2009-06-01T18:52:00.003-04:00

Some of my faithful readers have asked for a brief history of Reiki and how it spread across the world. Well, I'm not an historian, myself, but I read an amazing book who used first hand Japanese translations of the history itself. I will, of course, provide references at the bottom of this page.

Reiki, the word itself, in Japanese, actually stands for any kind of bioenergy work and is a fairly generic term...Rei meaning "universal" and Ki meaning "life force energy."

Reiki as the healing practice we know it to be comes from Mikao Usui, who was very curious about medicine and various healing practices. It is understood that around Spring of 1922, Usui went on a fasting retreat to Mount Kurama. At that time, he received the vibrational energy of Reiki. A maverick of his time, after testing the efficacy on his close family members, Usui sought to share this system with his fellow citizens, and initiated over 2000 Japanese students into Reiki practice. Interestingly enough, Usui referred to his practice as the "Secret of Happiness" and the "Secret of Medicine."

Because this is meant to be a brief history, I won't be going into how it came to the West, except to say it was from the Herculean efforts of Mrs. Hiwayo Takata, a truly amazing woman. You can read more about her in great detail at the referenced book below.

Reiki does have a spiritual side to it...mainly because we mere mortals have no idea what else to call vibrational energy. Westerners argue, "is it spiritual or medicinal?" The answer? Both? Neither? My question to the argumentative is this: Does it matter as long as it brings positive healing results?

Reference:
Miles, P. (2006). Reiki: A Comprehensive Guide. New York, NY: Penguin Books (USA) Inc.
ISBN: 1-58542-474-9

Reiki Experiments

2009-05-28T21:13:00.002-04:00

I have a few ideas on how Reiki can be empirically examined, but at this point, they are simply little seeds and have not yet blossomed into full-force studies at this time.

I got the idea when I was doing research on Complementary Alternative Medicine (CAM) in the mental health field. One study that was conducted used Reiki on cancer patients versus a control group that received no CAM. The patients who received CAM responded better to chemotherapy and cancer related fatigue. (1)

So I wondered why they responded better. Was it because they were simply being touched, or are all my observations correct through my own experiences...and there is something deeper going on here with energy we channel during a session?

Science does not set out to "prove" anything in its purest form...it sets out to explain. I desire explanations for things over blind faith, myself. I know, only through experience and observation, that Reiki works...regardless of belief in the system.

Where to go from here is the conundrum. Do we study how Reiki works? We know that Reiki can be seen on Infrared (IR) scopes and picked up on the Electromagnetic Field (EMF) meter...there are several videos that can be found on the internet of this, but there is only speculation on how it is working in the person's system (i.e., Chakra balancing and attunement).

I believe that Reiki will have to be explained first on the simple hypothesis that it does work. Once this becomes theory and is more widely accepted, then we can study and research the how. There will need to be a great deal of peer-reviewed studies, and, as Reiki becomes more widely accepted in the medical field, the studies will be increasingly funded and performed.

Reference:
(1). Tsang, K. L., Carlson, L. E., Olson, K. (2008). Research: Reiki Useful in Treating Cancer-Related Fatigue. Massage Magazine. 141, 96.

A Typical Reiki Session with Anne

2009-05-26T20:25:00.003-04:00

A lot of people wonder what a Reiki session with me is like...so I thought I'd share. If you like it well enough and are in the Atlanta area...feel free to book an appointment with me. :)

A typical house visit looks a little like this:

Before I come to your home, I give you a little coaching on how to ensure a blissful Reiki experience.

1. Secure a space where you will not be disturbed (no kids, pets, or phone calls) for one hour.

2. Have some of your favorite and comfortable blankets and pillows surrounding you. Iwill bring my own blankets and pillows as well (always freshly laundered in a hypoallergenic detergent).

3. Shut off your cell phone or leave it in another room where you won't hear it.

4. I bring my own music. I will need an area to plug in the music system.

5. Reiki practitioners wash hands before and after a session. I will need to use your sink.

Sometimes I bring a nice tea set with me if you have booked more than 45 minutes for a session, and I treat you to your choice of three wonderful teas, just to enhance the time we spend together. I also encourage you to drink plenty of water post-session (see my post on the Healing Reaction).

When I arrive, I start setting up in the room you choose. We will then sit and discuss some of the issues you want to address, as well as filling out your paperwork, which includes an Informed Consent form. Once payment is made (I work on a cash only basis, I don't take credit cards yet), I leave the room while you lie down on blankets and pillows on your back - I am in the other room, washing my hands and adding oil to my palms (unless you're allergic or want an unscented treatment). I then return to the room and begin the hands-on or hands-off treatment, depending on your preferences.

After the Reiki treatment, I leave the room and wash my hands again, giving you a chance to sit up, drink some water, and "come back" to the physical world. Then I pick up, and we have tea and/or discussion so I can answer any questions you might have. We then end the visit and I go on my merry way.

Sessions can be 30, 45, 60, 90, or 120 minutes long, depending on the time you've booked. They are very relaxing and enjoyable, for you AND for me!

Please feel free to visit my very own myspace page if you would like to book a session (in the Atlanta area): Divine Reiki Services.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

Catholicism and Reiki

2009-05-25T22:06:00.003-04:00

Having been raised Catholic, I believe, sincerely, that the religion has a lot to offer its people. So, you can imagine my surprise when I received a broadcast from Reiki Master/Teacher William Lee Rand regarding the United States Coalition of Catholic Bishops' (USCCB) statement mandating that Catholic hospitals and followers of the Catholic Faith should stop using Reiki.

I was positively crestfallen.

Catholicism is a loving faith (despite its less-than-positive reputation these days), that had instilled upon me to be Christ like, and lay my hands on others to heal them. Well, since I'm no Christ, I learned a handy system that allows me to spread God's love and hope for people everywhere through my Reiki practice.

I will not argue a person's choice on whether or not to receive Reiki. I will, however, work to clear up any misunderstandings that surround the practice of Reiki...which seem to be abundant in the recent statement made by the USCCB. Please feel free to read their statement here (requires Adobe Acrobat Reader).

The Coalition has a ton of secondhand information that they site as sources. This is a huge mistake on their part. Had they conducted appropriate, first-hand research, they would consider Reiki to be in line with Christ's teachings. In fact, I use anointing oil myself when laying on of hands.

Instead of rehashing what Mr. Rand said so eloquently, I will simply post a link to his response. Please feel free to read it here.

I encourage my readers to consider both texts and post comments and questions here. I will do my very best to answer and respond as quickly as possible.

All things considered, Reiki is a beautiful expression of love and compassion for our fellow creatures...how can that possibly go against any religious message? I can't answer that, because not only is it rhetorical, my inner self says it can't go against any philosophy or religion that encourages our most idealistic traits.

Namaste,
The Transpersonal Psychologist

The Healing Reaction

2009-05-23T01:25:00.004-04:00

When working with Reiki clients, many will complain that their symptoms get a little worse before they get better. In some cases, the symptoms in the body get a lot worse, and the client feels as if he or she is in "crisis mode." Sometimes, clients will start crying or laughing uncontrollably after a Reiki session. Most clients fall asleep during the session, then awaken about five or ten minutes after. It's essentially all categorized into the classification of the healing reaction.

Healing reactions occur when the body's Chakras (energy points) are "out of whack" in a manner of speaking. Years of poor diet, emotional trauma, abuses of any type (emotional/physical/sexual/psychological), legal and/or illicit drugs in the body, as well as conflicts in the mind, body, and spirit can cause the Chakras to become imbalanced. When presented with the relaxing, healing energy that Reiki has to offer, the body (more often than not) doesn't recognize the energy, and doesn't know what to do with it. After a few sessions (typically after session five), the body will begin to adjust accordingly, and the benefits of Reiki will blossom. Because of the intensity that some people experience during this detoxification process, we practitioners encourage and request that our clients drink plenty of water (around 1-2 liters per day) to flush the toxins from the body. This will help the client have an easier time coping with the healing reaction. (I personally drink 2-3 liters per day because it really helps!) Interestingly enough, my animal clients know to go to the water dish more often for the 48 hours post-session. We should all take a lesson from our companion animals!

Healing reactions can be physical (needing to use the bathroom more, for example), or emotional (laughing or crying uncontrollably for a short time after treatment). Many of my clients have minor healing reactions, while some have no healing reaction at all.

Some of my clients worry when they hear of the healing reaction and they don't have one. This is actually quite common, and nothing to worry about. Reiki is still performing its work on you, whether you have a reaction or not.

If you're considering Reiki as a way to relax and allow your body to tap into its own healing talent (while still maintaining your regular health regimen, of course), know that the healing reaction is completely normal and expected...just don't forget your water!

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Messages from our Bodies

2009-05-21T16:13:00.002-04:00

This blog draws from my experience and observations when using Reiki with clients. In this case, I hope that the anecdotal will become empirical through my observations and later experiments.

When I am ill, I consult a fellow Reiki practitioner to send Reiki to me and to come in and perform Reiki treatments. This past week, I caught a cold/virus/flu of some sort. I didn't have time to contact anyone, and had to use self-treatments only. When our bodies are ill, it is typically a sign that things are out of balance. This is why we go to see our chiropractors, acupuncturists, and Reiki practitioners...we need to come back into balance.

I am fortunate enough to have a spouse who is my care-giver when I am ill. With that, self-treatments, and plenty of liquids and rest, my body was able to come back into balance. I am here at my computer, feeling comfortable and well-rested. Though I am still a little weak from the illness, that will fade shortly with continued Reiki work as well as getting back into Yoga.

Stress has been shown to cause illness. Our rapidly moving lives, going from point to point, and not stopping to be grateful for what we have, as well as always trying to amass more and more "junk" that we really don't need, with poor diets on top of all this, cause our bodies to get out of synch with our psyche or spirits, and we become ill. More people suffer heart-attacks, diabetes, and high blood pressure more than ever before...because we don't take a moment to just stop and "smell the roses."

Take a moment today to fend off illness. Take just fifteen minutes to breathe, gaze at your surroundings, and fill yourself with gratitude for what you have in this life.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Self Care in Reiki

2009-05-16T22:19:00.002-04:00

When I do Reiki with clients who are in need of long term help, but only able to see me once every couple of weeks, I typically teach them how to do a self-treatment.

Self-Treatments are vital to Reiki Practitioners and should be done twice a day if at all possible. For example, right now I believe I have caught a cold, or I have some major allergies trying to disguise themselves as a cold. I have a sore throat and a lot of post-nasal drip. Along with the usual supportive care I give myself (vitamic C and zinc), I do localized self treatments of Reiki where I believe I need it. Note the italics on that first "I?" Well, Reiki is intelligent energy...and it will go where it needs to go, whether I know it or not. For example, I could have some energy blocked in my chest area but my symptoms are showing up in the throat...Reiki will work to remove the problem...not just treat the symptoms.

DISCLAIMER, because I have to: Reiki is a complementary treatment to all conventional therapies. It is never meant to replace medicine or treatment from a healthcare professional. If you suspect you are in need of a licensed medical professional's care, then seek it immediately. Do not use Reiki in place of your typical health regimen...it is a booster, not a replacement. Okay? Good. :)

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist

Reiki and Psychology

2009-05-14T22:24:00.001-04:00

This blog has been created as an exploration of alternative medicine in the Counseling Psychology field, mainly, Reiki and Mental Health.

I am a student of Argosy University working toward completion of my Masters degree and I am conducting independent studies on how Reiki helps people through body, mind and spirit. I will be using this blog to develop studies, gather information from people worldwide, and develop a therapeutic method that integrates Reiki into clinical practice for maximizing treatment outcomes. Upon graduation I will be applying to schools for my PhD in Transpersonal Psychology.

I will also use this blog to field email and questions regarding clinical practice of Reiki and Counseling Psychology.

So what is Reiki? Reiki is a form of touch therapy (which can actually be hands on or off) that induces deep relaxation and promotes the body's natural healing response. Sessions typically take between 15 minutes to an hour to complete, depending on how much energy flows between the channeler (Reiki Practitioner) and the recipient. Best of all, Reiki is not inundated in a religious or spiritual belief system, so one does not have to "believe in it" for it to work!

So what is Transpersonal Psychology? Simply put, TP in this blog does NOT stand for Toilet Paper. :) Trans Psych as it is lovingly called at times, goes beyond the personal, and into the realm of the mind/body/spirit connection. When counseling someone from the TP perspective (now you're thinking toilet paper, I just know it), the client's spirituality is taken into consideration. In my own observations, everyone has a spirit...even my atheist friends. In fact, some of my atheist friends are the most spiritual people I know...because they are willing to explore themselves in a quest for knowledge. So TP is really for everyone (both kinds of TP, as a matter of fact).

I hope you will enjoy this blog as much as I enjoy posting it. When I start looking for people to participate in studies, I will primarily be using Survey Monkey. Please feel free to email me at annelucienne@gmail.com for questions and comments.

Namaste,

The Transpersonal Psychologist